Online Marketing: My Rant on why SEO is Bullsh*t


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As many of you know, I have been an SEO practitioner for several years. I have made the conscious effort to stay up to date with trends and white hat best practices just to make sure I do not get penalized by our online big brother Matt Cutts.

The so called “truth” about SEO is that in order to build traffic and/or have your site rank, you need to enlist a number of different strategies. A few of these strategies include content creation, social media, and link building.  Each one of these have to be working in tandem with the other and abide by Google’s criteria in an effort to have your site index at a higher position over your competitors.

…well you know what, I say, “big monther f*cking stanky bullsh*t!” SEO is a bunch of witch craft and the occult put together.

My Case In Point

I have been vying for the key term ‘Echo Park real estate agent’ for years now.  I have been playing by the rules and keeping everything white hat.  I have been generating content and building links by the book. I have done everything necessary to make sure Google see’s my site and says, “this guy is relevant and legit, he needs to be on top of the page!”

Earlier this week I decided to check my status and this b*tchass website shows up:

bitchasswebsite

This d-bag came out of nowhere.  An unoptimized Squarespace template site with absolutely no equity whatsoever is currently nestled comfortably on the 2nd position on an organic search. Oh man! Am I heated. I did a competitive analysis of the site and that took me over the boiling point.  All this decaying tooth has in his favor are 3 back links from the exact same site (link’s he probably bought via a sponsored post)!

backlinks

Sonofa%$#&^#!@*!@)(@$#*$(*!(@$@#!@!!!!!!!!

Conclusion

Yes, I know there are anomalies that occur in Google’s algorithm that allow sites like this to rank.  …and yes, I know over time this overgrown nostril hair will eventually start to drop if he does not maintain good SEO practices.  It just goes to show you that if you do everything that you’re supposed to, Google still shoves a flying middle finger up your anus.  I hope you’ve found this post entertaining and maybe learned a thing of two about SEO. Thanks for letting me vent.  You can carry on with the rest of your day now.

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